WORTHWHILE READING

By Dr. Hoyt W. Allen, Jr.

The following article came to me recently and I contended that I should pass it on. It has been slightly edited and a conclusion added.

A young man was sitting in class when the professor asked him if he knew what the Roe vs. Wade decision was. He sat quietly, pondering his very profound question. Finally, after giving it a lot of thought, he sighed and said, "I think this was the decision George Washington made prior to crossing the Delaware "

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day ... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, "The reason has to be because a woman has to say everything twice. The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"

A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time." The wife responded, "Allow
me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art." "Really," answered the
neighbor. "What kind is it?" The man replied, "Twelve thirty."

Some Great Truths About Life:

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge, mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held it's ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.


(Continued)


(Continued)

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them
wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the wife asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the husband replied, "in-laws."

1) If you get to thinking you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else's dog around.

2) After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

3) There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works.

4) Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a lot easier than puttin' it back in.

5) If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

6) It doesn't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

7) When you're throwing your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

8) The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.

9) Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

10) Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Plainly, don’t get short changed. Let’s be ready to meet our Maker. The Bible teaches that to avoid hell and gain heaven - one must:

1) Believe In Jesus As Savior (16:31) 2) Repent Of Sins (17:30)
3) Confess Christ Audibly (8:37) 4) Be Baptized In Water (2:38)
5) Live A Christian Life (14:22) 6) Be Active In the Church (2:47)

KYOWVA Evangelistic Association
1541 S. 7th Street * Ironton, OH 45638
Web Page: www.kyowva.com * Free Bible Course Upon Request